Contrary to popular belief, I'm still alive and kicking. I've just been too caught up with working and earning money through secondary sources like Adsense, Agloco and EmailCashPro, which have earned me a grand total of $0.10 for the past 3 months.
However, as you can see it's not really a viable option to earn extra money in your own free time. I mean, if I were paid a dollar everytime the following happened I'd have bought over Donald Trump himself. And his daughter.
1) A dollar for everytime a mat* couple blasts fucking hiphop music over their handphone speakers in the last cabin of the MRT. This should be my richest source of income, because it happens almost everyday, everytime I take the MRT. How to promote public transport like that.
2) A dollar for every damn teenager who's wearing FleshImp or PureMilk shirts, and double the wage for purple and black-striped ones. These really get on my nerves. It used to be the hottest cool, or something like that, until nerdy teenagers all began to wear them until you see it more often than a Whatever or Anything poster.
3) A dollar for every mat* who wears his cap half a head higher than his own head. If one guy does it, it's cool and avant-garde. If too many guys do it, it looks like a sea of wanna-be Marge Simpsons blasting their fucking hiphop music through their handphone speakers.
4) A dollar for every time someone does the useless reminiscing on their last day at work. Nobody wants to know how funny it was when you tripped and fell on your face 3 years ago when you started this job, so just get over it and admit that you aren't coming back anymore.
5) A dollar for every Chinese family who walks side-by-side in Vivocity. By Chinese I mean from China, and by Vivocity I mean the huge-ass shopping centre with uncannily narrow walkways. And I don't mean that other people don't do it too, it's just that China tourists get more on my nerves than others do.
6) A dollar for every act-classy lady who mispronounces the names of drinks. Where I work, this happens so many times I begin to get immune to it. Ever so often, a lady with her pet fucking poodle would arrive in her shades and her leather beach bag and ask for a mojito. Mo-jee-to. And stop that rubbish about I say to-may-to you say to-mah-to, mojito is not an English word for Zeus' sake. Same reason why lingerie, croissant and foie gras is not pronounced the way aren't supposed to be. And not forgetting cachaça and caipirinha.
7) And why mojitos anyway? Why mojitos? Just because everyone is ordering it doesn't mean you have to. Like the way you don't have to order a waterfall everytime someone else did at the opposite end of the club. Be original. Be creative. Just order a backdraft or a Mai Tai or Black Russian. I will thank you for it.
*By mat I mean the mats in specific, not in general. I do have Malay friends who are fashionably sensible, well-mannered and cool to hang out with.
Cruiser tried to give some lame sign off here at 11:30:00 AM
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